Who would you choose to narrate your sex life?
Mind-boggling isn’t it? Isn’t it.
Can you tell I got distracted by "SNL...behind the scenes"? Whatever, fuck you all, that shit is like porn to me.
Can you tell I got distracted by "SNL...behind the scenes"? Whatever, fuck you all, that shit is like porn to me.
I chose…if you were wondering…Will Arnett, e-trade baby or Dexter.
The best answer may win some shit...maybe.
The best answer may win some shit...maybe.
Now answer, bitch(es).
I choose the guy who does the Geico commercials. He would say things like, "Did you really have to do that/say that/put that there/etc? Does Geico really save you a shit load on car insurance?"
ReplyDeleteVin Diesel. Or even better... Sean Connery. LOVE his voice! He can TALK me into bed with that voice!! =)
ReplyDeleteOh I LOVE Will Arnett! Can I steal that answer? I definitely I mis-interpreted the question at first, because my initial answer was Tina Fey. I'm not going to elaborate on why.
ReplyDeleteSome mix of James Earl Jones and Morgan Freeman, cause with me is like sex with God. Plus, I'm basically black from the waist down.
ReplyDeleteI personally would like for Disney to make a musical about my dating life staring Miley Cyrus... I think she could best portray my dirty ways! Lol! It would be amazing... It could be called Dick Rocks or Slutty Girl Musical... either would be fine!
ReplyDeleteI would have Samuel L Jackson to narrate my story. It would be full of the word "fuck".
ReplyDeleteI would like Dexter Morgan narrating my sex live but with colorful commentary from an Univision soccer commentator to scream GOOOOALLLLL when she orgasms. A man can dream. I also am hooked on the SNL backstage shit, hilarious.
ReplyDeleteMy first instinct was Morgan Freeman, but then I thought that may be too Shawshank. SO upon further contemplation, I choose Clive Owen. He could talk me right out of my clothes with a simple, "Hello, I'm Clive. And you are?" My response at that point would be, "I am coming."
ReplyDeleteI want the Most Interesting Man In The World's Announcer. Not him, his announcer from the commercials. Go and look and imagine him talking about my sex life. Go ahead, I'll wait.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2bpu3kIcpQ&
Awesome right?
Michael Buffer. I mean is there really any other choice?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WvufFwdqMzg
And this link pretty much nails it.
A guy with a Boston accent. I don't know what it is, but man those voices make me horny.
ReplyDeleteeither samuel l. jackson or morgan freeman. jackson has a little more spunk in his voice, but freeman sounds so solemn i'm undecided.
ReplyDeleteshellasaurusrex at gmail.com
I would say Bill Clinton. Just because when he talks about "not having sexual relations" it's just funny! Or I would have Ben Stein narrate my sex life! Just because it's Ben fucking Stein!
ReplyDeleteJeffery Dunham! He could use all his dummies to narrate all different situations in my life. One for my sex life, one for my eating habits, one for my inner thoughts, one to narrate my emotions, another to narrate my inner black-ness.. This way I don't have to just choose one person to narrate my life :) Selfish, sneaky and awesome I know!
ReplyDeleteI watched that SNL special last night, too.
ReplyDeleteTo narrate the story of my sex life, I would probably choose Morgan Freeman. Because, you, know, I'm classy like that.
Christopher Walken...don't know why...just think it'd be interesting! haha.
ReplyDeleteim thinking John Waters or the church lady from SNL. Creepy always wins! :)
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ReplyDeleteLeonard Cohen. Because that way, even where it was pretty sleazy, it would still sound ambiguous enough to MAYBE come across as holy and/or highbrow.
ReplyDeleteGilbert Godfrey.
ReplyDeletePatrick Warburton Nuff said!
ReplyDeleteMorgan Freeman. Or Pierce Brosnan.
ReplyDeleteoh man these are all so great guys!
ReplyDeleteHaha, Dexter... good one. That could work. Was thinking more along the lines of Paul Bettany because he is freakin' funny.
ReplyDeleteoh my first choice was james earl jones but then someone mentioned sam jackson and hell to the yes on that one !!! fuck it would be so funny, mind you the e-trade baby is pretty cool to hahaha that was awesome
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